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<From The Wall, Tuesday, August 12, 2008 >

Kara, hurled "In A Class By Itself" by Sandra Brown (audio CD) against The Wall.
The reasons were:

Holy god. This is craptacular. The story feels rushed and implausible (even for a romance novel), and seems as though it was written by a twelve-year-old. (Trust me-I remember writing crappy romance fiction in Middle School, and this story reeks of acne soap and Pink Pearl erasers.) The hero is stuck in the past - specifically, ten years ago when he and the heroine were high-school sweethearts. I don't know if it's just how Brown wrote him or how the reader performs the character, but the hero comes across as goofy and dumb. The reader makes him sound like Slingblade; “You really make me hot, french fried potatoes, mmmhmmm.” Billy Bob Dumbass kidnaps the heroine and offers to trade her some land in exchange for a night of sex. The heroine agrees to it barely without a second’s hesitation, and only gets angry when the hero doesn't claim his payment right away. In one scene, the heroine wakes up to find the hero watching her sleep. A friend of mine once locked her boyfriend out of the house and woke to find him watching her; believe me, it’s not sweet – it’s disturbing. Unless you’re in an ICU, no one should be watching you sleep. Honestly, I can’t get into a story that revolves around the premise of two high-school teenagers having such an epic love that kidnapping the woman many years later seems appropriate. I had plenty of boyfriends in high school, but c’mon – if one of them kidnapped me ten years later and tried to trade a piece of land for a night of sex, I’d tear off his “turgid man-root” and make him eat it. (So stop calling me, Matt.) Jesus.

I, ,
just want to add:

Characters remaining:
The rule is still to hurl books not people. If you don't like this rule and want to rant against Slake, just email slake@slake.com.
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Sarah added:

I have never liked Sandra Brown's writing, so this just reinforces my preference. The hero was watching the heroine sleep? That's kinda creepy. I think I might start throwing punches if woke up and found someone watching me. This book seems too smack of stalking.

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